Survivor

Sometimes I can still hear the bleeping

You’d think after all this time I wouldn’t

But it still haunts me when I’m sleeping

In the light of day I can switch off and stop

But in the early hours, just me awake

It fills my head like a heavy drop

The bleeps go on

Sometimes I can still feel the pain

I should be over this by now

But maybe that’s the way it takes the sane

You push it down and won’t give in

So it lingers there just beneath

Searching always for its way to win

The beeps go on

I’m lucky though, I live my dreams

With someone beside me

We changed the beeps to blips on screens

The joy of life passed on

And kept, and treasured and more

Through my daughter and son

The blips go on

Stairs

I’m 

      Not

            Going 

                       Down

                                  There 

                                             It’s dark

It’s ok, my boy, I’m right here and mummy is downstairs waiting. Just walk between us.

No! 

I’m 

      Not 

             Going 

                         Down 

                                    There

                                              It’s dark

You’ll be fine, I promise. Trust me, nothing will get you. You’re safe.

No!

I’m 

     Not

           Going

                     Down

                               There

                                          It’s dark

Ok, I’ll go down with you. Take my hand and we’ll go together. 

But

      When

                We

                     Go

                         Down

                                    It

                                        Will

                                                Still be dark

Yes, but I’ll be beside you

Yes

I’m glad my father doesn’t ask me to go into the darkness alone. I’m always braver when I know he’s next to me.